Alive.

Busy. Bleary-eyed. Vacillating stress levels. Coffee. Gym orientation this morning. Severely out of shape. Desperate to feng shui my cube. Need to find post-work satisfaction. Sewing classes? Maybe.

window shopping is my cardio.

I had another good day... that's a 2-day streak, people! Now we're really cooking...

*Made a big jug of iced green tea with a leftover bunch of fresh mint... tasty and hydrating and metabolism-charging.

*Got lots of walking in at Ikea. Didn't buy anything -- I had a list of things my house could use (with measurements and everything!), but I just couldn't bring myself to pull the trigger on anything. I realized that I'm in more of a purging mood today, than an acquiring one. Oh, and I'm still feeling "eh" on a a lot of their merchandise...

*Packed my lunch and some snacks for the Ikea run so I wouldn't cave to the siren song of the Swedish meatballs.

*Tracked my food, and dinner tonight will bring me in right around 1200 calories.

distraction.

I became distracted yesterday with a home improvement project, and didn't do a daily recap post. My distraction, however, also meant that I didn't think about food all day. I didn't boredom snack. And I lifted and heaved and squatted and pushed heavy things. And my body feels wonderfully used today.

My weight is on the decline. I shall be holding my breath and hoping it continues.

Update on the job saga:

Job A didn't come through BUT the director wrote me the absolute nicest rejection letter I've ever received. She asked to show my resume around, offered to be a reference, and I think she sincerely would like to hire me in the future. I've never felt so good about a job I didn't get.

I'm going in for round three of interviews for Job B. Man, I hope the hoops are worth it.

woops.

I skipped the daily recap yesterday, didn't I? Totally slipped my mind. So here's a brief remembrance:

*15 minutes on the elliptical (I'm getting really bored with this thing... might need to start branching out)

*200 sit ups and a few squats while holding weights (skipped arm work b/c my part-time job involves pushing and pulling rolling stacks around, and I need all the upper body strength I can muster)

*Still drying out successfully.

*Tracked food and stayed on track EVEN THROUGH THE EVENING! Yes! I went to bed a bit peckish, but nothing serious. It felt good to wake up this morning and not feel regret.

I'm off to my parents' farm this morning for my cousin's wedding. We're roasting a whole pig on a spit -- it's going to be awesome. I will do my best to not go hogwild (hehe...). I'm also going to try to pick up a good lap-swimming bathing suit on the way home so that I can get some swimming in if I decide to stick around and spend some time with the family.

daily recap.

The past couple days have been tough with all the nerves and anticipation, but I did do a few things right today...

*Only had time for coffee and an apricot before running to the interview, but had my oatmeal when I got back and was starving.

*Water, water, water.

*Planned and tracked my food.

* Finished dinner and was still feeling the desire for food -- not actual hunger, just that mouth-y craving for more. I almost gave in to the peanut butter jar again, but forced myself to wait until the food actually settled in my stomach and told my brain that all was well. Very happy I did.

*Did 15 minutes on the elliptical, and then cut it short from boredom and decided I would walk to the bank to deposit a check instead.

*Spent the evening drinking tea to keep myself occupied.

*Did NOT stop off for a bottle of wine (or the ingredients for a margarita which is what I was truly craving) on the way home from HomeGoods (a.k.a. My Never Fail Boredom-Fix Destination).

The question for the rest of the evening: Who Will Win: Me or the Peanut Butter?

Place your bets.

daily recap.

The accomplishments today...

*Did 30 minutes on the elliptical in an attempt to calm my nerves...sort of worked, but I was still pretty edgy for the rest of the day.

*Grunted through 100 sit ups.

*Drank lots of water.

*Only half a giant cup of coffee today -- I'm slowly loosening that monkey's grip on my neck... I'll still give him a piggyback ride on a regular basis, but I just need his hold on me to release a little bit.

*Spent the afternoon trying to distract myself from my anxiety by running errands and shopping for a more sporty bathing suit that I can comfortably swim laps in... no luck yet.

*Recognized that hunger is not an emergency while I was shopping, and didn't cave and buy something off-plan while I was out. Instead, I did a quick stop at Trader Joe's and picked up my favorite healthy go-to items, which I know how to portion and track easily. For instance...

• goat cheese
• zucchini (to bulk up pasta sauces)
• high fiber wheat bread
• British muffins
• 0% Greek yogurt
• nonfat cottage cheese
• organic wild blueberries
• wild salmon (frozen)
• 96/4 ground beef
• TJ's low fat chicken soup

I also picked up a flat of organic apricots, which were singing to me. And I decided to try the TJ's Italian Style Turkey Breast cold cuts (because I was feeling the need to freebase some protein) and it was deeelicious.

*Tracked my food

• B'fast: the habitual oatmeal/flax/blueberry
  
• Lunch: whole wheat grilled cheese and a fiber one bar for lunch
• Snack: turkey cold cuts
  
• Dinner: 96/4 burger on a TJ's British muffin and a heaping bowl of zucchini with an eensy bit of goat cheese
• Snack: 2 apricots
  

Total Calories: 1362

*Here's hoping I'm so pooped tonight I pass out nice and early -- I have another interview tomorrow morning and I need to look all fresh and corporate for this one!

daily recap.

One of my reasons for starting this blog is to establish a consistent way to track my weight loss progress. I'm going to try doing this through a daily recap post. I plan to add to the post throughout the day in its draft form and then publish it at night. I'll be tracking food, exercise, and the intangibles that really make the difference over the long haul -- turning down a cupcake at work, walking to the bank instead of driving, remembering that hunger is not an emergency, etc.

I expect that as I get back into the game, the things I track will change, but for now it's a free-for-all -- I'm jumping in with both feet! I'm going to focus on the positive in these recaps. There will undoubtedly be confessionals (lots of confessionals) but they will be separate. The daily recaps will serve as a record of my effort, and of the kindness I'm trying to show to myself, and will hopefully be a way for me to see progress when I hit those inevitable plateaus.

So, today...

*I woke up at 8am to start establishing a healthier, and more consistent sleep schedule.

*I ate a healthy b'fast of oatmeal, flaxseed, and wild blueberries and one gigantic mug of coffee (but just one...an improvement).

*I worked out on the elliptical for 30 minutes.

*I did 100 sit ups.

*I lifted weights, and even did a few squats (which I'll be feeling tomorrow).

*I packed a healthy meal and snacks to take to work.

*I drank lots of water.

*I snuck into the stacks at the library and did some more squats and stretches... shhhhhh...

*Not a single sip of wine passed my lips (It was starting to get a wee bit over the top there. I'm going to be drying out for awhile, potentially until I reach my goal, but we'll see... I may post more on this topic later).

*I hit 1260 calories and didn't snack like a rabid wolf (rabid wolves being renowned for their munchies).